Thursday, September 15, 2011

real life issues

This post will probably be a little bit more serious than most for me, but I want to be honest with you and where I am in my life right now.  This week marked my 37th birthday...its certainly not the first time a birthday has made me feel "old" but I suddenly am feeling like 40 is just around the corner, and how did that happen? 

It seemed somehow appropriate that I spent my birthday afternoon at the cardiologist. Now the good news, is that he doesn't seem to think much is wrong, and so that visit went about as well as I could possibly have hoped.   It has been one of those months where I seem to be at a doctor's office every time I turn around...4 times to my primary care, 1 to the cardiologist, 1 routine check-up for the girlie as she turned 6, 1 trip to promptcare for 2 stitches for the boy, and today was off to the dentist for a cleaning.  It doesn't improve yet, as there is the annual trip to the dermatologist next week for him to check my fair skin (and many freckles and moles), another 2 dental appointments (hubby and daughter), and a follow up with primary care and cardiologist in 4 more weeks. Ugh.  But the bottom line with all of this....and I stress this because I don't want you to that I am FINE.  Little problems, all of it. Most of all, even the little things seem to be getting better.

And that's where I get stuck.  Because in the midst of all of my little problems and my temptation to throw myself a pity party, I need to get a grip on myself.  In the past 8 weeks, I have seen my mother-in-law come through illness we were not sure she would survive, and she will (God-willing) get to come home within the next 2 weeks or so.  I have had a 33 year old friend, with 2 little ones, who has been diagnosed with breast cancer and undergone a double mastectomy.  I have a church aquaintance, 42 years old with growing boys at home, diagnosed with colon cancer and she underwent intense radiation prior to surgery which was in fact today.  I know a family  from my daughter's school, whose 4 year old is undergoing chemo for a rare type of cancer.  And most of all, I see them all going through these trials with such grace that I am constantly humbled.  I am driven to prayer, and for this, I thank God and I am thankful for these friends who share their journeys with illness so candidly.  

I am strengthened by them.  I am given hope from God. I am learning more about where I have failed to put my complete trust and hope in Jesus.  I hope that you, my family and friends and other readers, are with me here:  we do not know the number of our days.  I hope my number is somewhere up around 20,000 more (which would put me close to ninety!).  I pray that I may live each and every one with my face turned toward the One who knows my heart, my weaknesses, and my selfishness, and who loves me anyway.

God brings to my mind this verse today, and I pray it, for myself, for those friends and family I mentioned above, and for you....

"And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus."
Philippians 4:19

1 comment:

  1. I struggle in the same ways. Things start to a little difficult and I start to throw myself a pity party.... then I look around and realize all that God has given me. End pity party. Start thanksgiving. It's a hard lesson that I think we learn over and over again. Thanks for the great verse!